Giver

Your words…

Every generous act and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of Lights; with Him there is no variation or shadow cast by turning.  James 1:17

My words…

A prayer of praise and thanks
You, the Father of Lights, do not shine like the sun, warming only part of the orb at a time or being hidden by clouds or other celestial bodies. With You, there are no shadows. Your radiance is…always. I praise You, Father of Lights.
A gift is a reflection of the giver. When You give, it’s the perfect gift at the perfect time (because You are perfect). You give because it brings You joy. You give because it’s who You are. And I am humbled and joy-filled to be on the receiving end of Your gifts, especially the intangibles: my adoption as Your daughter (I am proud to uphold Your name.), my freewill (I appreciate being allowed to make my own decisions.), my all-expenses-paid entrance into the heavenly places (I could never have done it on my own.), Your listening ear (You always have time for me.), inexplicable peace (even in the midst of chaos), hope (my future is secure), and most of all, that part of You that You placed in my inmost-being (almost too glorious to be true – almost). I thank You, Father of Lights.

Confident

Your words…

The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom should I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom should I be afraid? When evildoers came against me to devour my flesh, my foes and my enemies stumbled and fell. Though an army deploys against me, my heart is not afraid; though a war breaks out against me, still I am confident.  Psalm 27:1-3

My words…

Praise
I place very little confidence in humankind. I’m not 100% confident that my doctor knows what he’s talking about or that my airplane pilot hasn’t been drinking before climbing into the cockpit. I am confident that I have been lied to over and over by politicians. I don’t expect anything different, so I am not that disappointed when it happens. How refreshing, then, when I know I can place my full confidence in You, in who You are and what You do. You don’t make mistakes. Dallas Willard said it best: My confidence in [God] simply means that I believe that he is right about everything: that all that he is and says shows what life is at its best, what it was intended by God to be. When I pray and You answer, I know it was supposed to be that way. That confidence gives birth to unimaginable peace.
Prayer for me
I’ve never had an evildoer come against me to devour my flesh, but I know what it’s like to fear. I do not have enough confidence in my own faith that I would say, “You are my stronghold. Whom should I fear?” But I have the confidence in You to see me through whether I say it or not. Keep growing my faith. Please do not stop.
Forgive me
I am confident in my spirit that You are the God over all the heavens and earth, that You see me, know me, and love me. I confess, however, that that confidence wobbles when I pray the same intercession over and over, and the suffering does not end. Something heaven-sent is happening, but I can’t see it. Everything looks like it did the day before. Forgive me when doubt picks at my faith like I pick at a loose thread. Fear creeps. After all this time I should be shouting, “Whom should I fear?”
Prayer for others
I pray for those whose confidence in You has been shattered. A death occurred. A diagnosis was confirmed. Security was stolen. The answer was no instead of yes. Confidence can be re-built and strengthened. You can do that. I pray that You will.
More praise
I wonder, as I sit here: How much confidence do You have in me? I spend way too much time asking, “What do I think about God?” instead of, “What does God think about me?” The answer to the latter outweighs that of the former, for what You think of me is, truthfully, the impetus for restorative transformation. It’s the only reason I make any effort to change. You are my light and my salvation – of this I am confident.

Anymore

Your words…

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away. Revelation 21:4

My words…

Praise
You promise such a time – a time I cannot perceive. No death nor anything associated with it. No child-sized coffins. No crematoriums. No eulogies. No tissues. No need for pain-killers. No scars or bruises. No canes or wheelchairs. Not anymore. Peace will replace anxiety. Contentment will overshadow depression. The radiance of Your glory will send darkness scurrying. Everything I dread will have passed away, and I will exist unburdened – light, like air. I won’t have to wonder what the heavens feel like. Not anymore.
Prayer for me
So much of my energy is spent avoiding pain, avoiding the headache from too much crying. But the pain and tears happen anyway. They creep in. They burst in. I say, “That’s life.” It’s what I’ve come to expect. I can’t avoid it completely. Not in this life. There is one truth I cling to when the tears flow: One day You will wipe them away, and I won’t have to cry anymore.
More praise
What joy this must bring You to offer Your children a life without painful tears. I could never do that for my children. This is a promise only You can make, and I am holding You to it!

Inertia

Your words…

So Jesus said to them, “I assure you: unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you do not have life in yourselves. Anyone who eats My flesh and drinks My blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up on the last day because My flesh is real food and My blood is real drink.” When many of his disciples heard this, they said, “This teaching is hard! Who can accept it?” From that moment many of his disciples turned back and no longer accompanied Him.  John 6:53-55, 60, 66

My words…

Praise
When I examine Your teaching style, Jesus, I see You as a rational professor, dedicated to moving Your students toward understanding how to know the Father and how to get to Him. Not every lesson was taught on a mountainside as Your words caressed the ears of Your listeners like a soft, cool breeze. Some of Your lessons were hard like bricks. Addition and subtraction leads to calculus. Love your neighbor leads to love your enemy. You want Your students to know that there is only one way to the Father, to life eternal, and that is through You, which means taking You into my life. You become my sustenance. A difficult lesson to grasp – a lifetime to put into practice. But, oh, so worth it.
Prayer for others
I regard Your followers, in the first century and now, as students of Your wisdom and knowledge. Some are devoted to soaking in what You share, waiting at the door of the Professor’s office to speak to You after class. Others make it to the midterm and drop out when lessons get tough. They were moving along in a trajectory to the Father, but one difficult lesson acts as an external force that either diverts the students off course or ends the forward progress altogether. It is for these former students that I write this prayer. I know so many. I don’t know what it would take to turn their hearts back to You – but You do. There is no way to make the hard lessons easy. But I pray they will know that working through the challenges brings a reward of peace and hope that extends way beyond this earthly classroom.
More Praise
My path to the Father looks more like a plate of spaghetti than a straight line. I have been drawn off course more times than I care to think. But You are always there when I come back around. I don’t completely understand the hard lessons. Do any of us students? But I will one day when I meet the Professor face to face.

Confident

Your words…

So don’t throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you need endurance, so that after you have done God’s will, you may receive what was promised. For yet in a very little while, the Coming One will come and not delay. But My righteous one will live by faith; and if he draws back, I have no pleasure in him.* But we are not those who draw back and are destroyed, but those who have faith and obtain life.   Hebrews 10:35-39, *Habakkuk 2:3-4

My words…

Praise
When I walked across the Golden Gate Bridge, I didn’t worry that it would crumble beneath my feet and I would plunge into San Francisco Bay. I had confidence in the bridge builders. I have built some “bridges” in my life that I didn’t feel as confident crossing. Like the Raising Children Bridge. I’ve crossed it without plunging into an abyss, but not because I had confidence in my abilities. In fact, that bridge rippled in the wind a couple times, and I barely hung on. I lost my footing on My Faith Bridge more than once (to say the least). I came upon some fog and stopped moving for a while. The fog cleared, and my journey continued. I’ve come to the end of some bridges and some I have yet to cross. But this I have learned from You: I needn’t have confidence in the bridge if I have confidence in the One leading me across.
Prayer for me
There are many areas of my life wherein I lack confidence. If a recipe begins with the words “dissolve yeast,” I toss the recipe and buy dinner rolls. Not an issue. But when I am confronted with someone who is grieving or despairing, I lack the confidence to know how to comfort them, to know what to say. In those times, will You help me? Instead of having confidence in myself, I ask you to lead me in placing my confidence in Your Spirit.
Prayer for others
There is a family who is grieving the murder of their three-year-old daughter. Her body was found in a dumpster. Indescribable grief. I have confidence that You will comfort them when I ask. Wrap them in Your arms and bring them peace. I also have confidence in Your wisdom to bring judgment on those who are responsible for such grief. Woe to those who cause Your children harm and remain remorseless and unrepentant.
Thank You
Thank You for the seasons of earth and the seasons of life. Nothing remains static. Everything changes. The leaves are radiant yet they are dying. I thank You for the autumn of my life.
More praise
You are the One in whom I place my confidence, and I would never throw it away. I hold it in front of me as a shield. I will not draw back. I will not be destroyed.

Liturgy

Your words…

The Lord spoke to Aaron, “When you enter the Tent of Meeting, you must distinguish between the holy and the common…”  Leviticus 10:10

Araunah said, “Why has my lord the king come to his servant?” David replied, “To buy the threshing floor from you in order to build an altar to the Lord.” Araunah said, “My lord the king may take whatever he wants.” The king answered, “No, I insist on buying it from you, for I will not offer to the Lord my God burnt offerings which cost me nothing.”  2 Samuel 24:21-24 selected verses

My words…

Praise
These words of Yours, spoken to Aaron millennia ago, are the foundation and inciting action for my published prayer journey. I reasoned that I should not bring my common words before You; words that have been weighed and found wanting do not belong in a prayer before Your throne. My desire was to offer prayers plump with meaning and honesty, wrapped in holiness. Looking back, I can see I missed the mark at times. But one thing I know: My words are uncommon. No one else has prayed them before I did.
For the past few days You have received prayers and worship which You have never heard from me before. However, these moments of praise and lament did not flow from me naturally since I was reading every word from a book of liturgy. I read, I chanted, I prayed, I listened, I put the book away. Thousands upon thousands of people have prayed and chanted these same words over the years. I balanced this experience with my usual free-spirited style of worship, and a question formed in my mind: Are my prayers and praise holy enough? Are they uncommon enough? They certainly don’t sound anything like what I have been reciting through liturgy. For example, I usually do not begin a prayer to You with a salutation. You know my prayer is to You since I believe there is no other god but You. I usually do not end my prayer with an Amen or a Let It Be So. It sounds like an ending to a book (The End), and I don’t want it to be the end. I want my years of prayers and adoration to be one continuous string of light, twinkling at Your feet forever – a string that grows longer each day. After meditating on my liturgical worship, I believe I know why I left the sanctuary so…joyless: My worship to You was too easy. I didn’t expend any effort. It cost me nothing except forty minutes of my time. It was worship, but, for me, it was inexpensive worship.

My Liturgy

My collection of prayers and praise form my own personal liturgy. I have gone back and recited prayers to You years after I wrote them. My liturgy is imperfect, littered with misspellings, bad grammar, and, perhaps, even worse theology. But every thought is mine, and every word is dedicated to You with a heart gushing with praise and exultation, pleas for forgiveness, and petitions for those I love and those I have never met. It hasn’t cost me anything worth mentioning compared to Your sacrifice, but it has cost me something. And this small, uncommon sacrifice, I offer to You as one more light in the string.

Clothe

Your words…

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.  Colossians 3:12, 14

My words…

Praise
Being chosen, set apart and dearly loved by You comes with a Designer wardrobe. The outfit is for every season, one size fits all. Each piece is unique, but when worn together, the ensemble is complete. It’s an honor to be be clothed by the greatest Designer in the universe.
Prayer for me
Here’s something I’ve noticed: When I take off  a garment – say, patience – because I  grow weary of one thing or another and begin to snap, I find that when I go to put patience on again, it doesn’t fit; it’s loose in places and sags. I don’t “fill it out” anymore. Help me to stay clothed always in these virtues. They never grow smelly or stiff. They are infused with the scent of heaven.
Forgive me
I walked by a woman in the bookstore today. She wore a t-shirt which read, “Ask me about my story.” She smiled and met my eyes. I smiled and walked on. I sat in my car and wished I would have asked her about her story. She obviously wants to tell people. I wouldn’t be surprised if her story had something to do with You in her life. I let my humility slip. How much time would she have taken up? I’m on my lunch hour for pity’s sake. It brings to mind how much of my time I think about me, me, me. Forgive me.
Thank You
I am not just loved; I am dearly loved. And not just dearly loved but dearly loved by You. I can’t comprehend the depth of Your love. If I did, my heart would explode, I imagine. So I thank You for Your love and look forward to the day when I will understand it perfectly with an intact heart.
More praise
Your love is the thread that binds my wardrobe together. Your love is the reason I have a wardrobe at all. When I show compassion, it’s because You love me. When I am kind and gentle, I am imitating You. Without Your love, it would all unravel.

Mind-set

Your words…

For those who live according to the flesh think about the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit, about the things of the Spirit. For the mind-set of the flesh is death, but the mind-set of the Spirit is life and peace. You are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, since the Spirit of God lives in You. Romans 8:5-6, 9

My words…

Praise
You don’t seem to mind repeated praise. David did it. Now I will do it. I have praised You so many times for being The God Who Indwells. No other god does it. No other god can. But You chose to exist outside of Yourself, outside of heaven, and inhabit Your children. Only You, who knows full-well the condition of my heart would choose to dwell there. You’re not put off by the mess, and for this I am eternally grateful.
Prayer for me
Life and peace. That’s what I want. I want life to the fullest, to the most abundant where I may exist on earth while holding heaven in my heart. I want to stand against what evil slithers across my path and know I am not alone. When I witness an injustice, I want to be lead to pray. I want to revel in the truth that I am Your child and rely on that confidence when doubt rears its head. That’s what I want.
Forgive me
Forgive me when my mind is pulled away from the “things” of the Spirit and twists toward the “things” of the flesh. (Do I really want to blog this week? Instead, I’ll spend more time on this other task. But this task is just too difficult. I’m taking a much-needed break. Ahhh.) I am learning that “things” of the flesh never work out in the end.
Prayer for others
Oh, that everyone would have the mind-set of Your Spirit! Everyone in the world. Everyone in my country. Everyone in my city. Everyone in my home. Including me.
More praise
Life: it’s what courses through my veins and spirit. Peace: it’s the undercurrent of Your presence that makes life worth living.

Time

Your words…

For in your sight a thousand years are like yesterday that passes by, like a few hours of the night.  Psalm 90:4

My words…

Praise
When I say I don’t know this or that, I feel stupid. (I don’t know how to fix my computer.) But when I say I don’t know how time is different for You compared to me, I don’t feel dumb. No one knows that answer. No one but You. (And You don’t count in this example.) Did You create time, or was it always just there? If You created time, then that movement from timelessness to time is, in itself, a succession of events, which usually means a passing of time. Yikes. So perhaps You co-exist with time? Maybe? If You live within time, then you can, as scripture says, foreknow something. Yes? Before my noodle is thoroughly baked, I have made the decision not to spend any more time of this matter! Here is what I know about You from what You have taught me over the decades: You are now. You are then. You are always. That pretty much wraps it up for me.
Prayer for me
I have spent my whole life on some sort of time schedule. Even as an infant I lived according to my mother’s schedule. Clocks, watches, sundials, all reminders that time moves along, and I can’t do a thing about it. But lately that fact has been draining my spirit of its joy. Thanksgiving is just around the corner, but I swear I just made that turkey last month. But instead of fretting about how time flies, I need to discern the best way to spend each moment I have left. And that is why I look to You and ask for a measure of righteous wisdom.
Forgive me
Forgive me for the hours and days I diverted from what I should have done to what I wanted to do. I can’t get that time back. I don’t want to have to ask You to forgive me for this same sin again.
Prayer for others
Today I pray for those who have so little time left on earth. They are elderly and weak or terminally ill. They may not see their next birthday or live to attend their child’s wedding. For those who long to see Paradise, I pray they will find some joy in their last days. For those who have no hope, I pray You will send some their way.
Thank You
I am so grateful for the time You have given me on this earth. I have enjoyed decades of undeserved blessing. Thank You for holding me in Your hand.
More praise
People say that time is precious. It is. But even more precious is You in my life.

Alive

Your words…

For the word of God is living and effective and sharper than any double-edged sword, penetrating as far as the separation of soul and spirit, joints and marrow. It is able to judge the ideas and thoughts of the heart. No creature is hidden from Him, but all things are naked and exposed to the eyes of Him to whom we must give an account.  Hebrews 4:12-13
Remember Your word to Your servant; You have given me hope through it. This is my comfort in my affliction: Your promise has given me life.  Psalm 119:49-50

My words…

Praise
I am surrounded by life – people, animals, plants – all moving, growing, talking, chirping. In time, what surrounds me will die, or I will die first. Your word is alive, cutting, penetrating, separating, judging, exposing. Your words have been around before people, animals, and plants. You spoke us all into existence. But You didn’t stop the flow of living words. They streamed from Your prophets, priests, apostles, Son. Your words do not grow out of style. They do not lose their relevance. They remain alive on the page and on the lips of believers. They will remain alive forever, in this world and the next.
Prayer for me
Whenever I am near what is purely alive – a vine bursting with fruit, baby birds in a nest, a playground teeming with children – I feel more alive myself. When Your word fills my mind and heart, I am living most earnestly, most abundantly. Now, one would think that I would strive every moment to maintain that level of existence through a constant connection to Your word, wouldn’t one? We both know I don’t. I pray for a heart that holds a daily thirst which can only be quenched through Your word.
Forgive me
Forgive me during times of distress when I don’t remember Your promises – first. I eventually come around to them but not until I’ve tried my own feeble “remedies” (which usually include some form of sugar). Will you please forgive me, yet again? I know You will. I know You have.
Prayer for others
I drove through an intersection the other day and saw a well-dressed woman praying with a homeless man by the side of the road. His tattered cardboard sign hung at his side as she held his shoulders and prayed with eyes closed. Bless this servant of Yours! She was Jesus to that man at that moment.
Thank You
Your words are sharp enough to carve between what is carnal and what is spiritual. The blade isn’t dull. It hurts, but it’s the only way for me to be free of the stuff that leads to death. What’s left is Your glory. Thanks for cutting.
More praise
I see Your revelations, prophesies, instructions, and promises as invisible, charged particles zipping through my flesh and bones and mind and heart. They never stop moving; they are loaded with energy, spilling truth and wisdom. Never still. Never weakened. Alive forever and ever.